80sucks.com – Michael Clayton, Tampa Bay Buccaneers Wide Receiver, SUCKS!
19Oct/091

14 Guys You’ve Never Heard Of That Are Better Than Michael Clayton

I don't know who these guys are, but I'd take any one of them over Clayton

I don't know who these guys are, but I'd take any one of them over Clayton

How bad is Michael Clayton?

We decided that we needed a more concrete answer to this question than just "he sucks".  How bad is he really?  So to answer the question, we did a little investigative journalism, and some exhaustive editing, and came up with a list of 14 wide receivers in the NFL that had better stats than Michael Clayton.  Oh yeah, and we tried to find guys that you literally had never heard of. 

So what were the criteria, how did we come up with the list?  Well first, we decided to compile a list of guys that had better statistics than Michael Clayton in every metric.  In other words, there were some guys that had more catches but less yards, so we scratched them out.  There were some guys with more yards but less catches, so we scratched them out.  There were some guys with more drops but less...just kidding, nobody has more drops than Clayton.  And of course nobody has less TD's than Clayton, so that one doesn't matter.

Then we went over the list again and took out the guys that you shouldn't have ever heard of, but did because they were in some way high profile like Sidney Rice who plays with Brett Favre or Pierre Garcon who plays in Indy or Louis Murphy that nobody outside of Florida knows but you do. 

We can't believe we're saying this but we were actually very fair to Clayton in compiling this list.  There were lots of guys that we felt belonged on the list, but we took them out because we thought someone might have heard of them (besides just the true fantasy geeks).

So here it is, 15 guys that you've never heard of that are better than Michael Clayton.  (And we're sure they probably all get paid far less, but we didn't do the research to confirm it)  Also, interesting note: there are three guys on this list (meaning they have better stats than Clayton) that play in St. Louis, the worst offense in the NFL.  Now if that doesn't tell you how bad Michael Clayton is then you just don't get it.

Donnie Avery - St. Louis - 2nd year out of Houston
rec-19 yds-213 td-2
last year-3td

Earl Bennett - Chicago - 2nd year out of Vanderbilt
rec-19 yds-257 td-0
last year-no catches

Davone Bess - Miami - 2nd year out of Hawaii
rec-23 yds-175 td-0
last year-1td

Mark Bradley - Kansas City - 5th year out of Oklahoma
rec-15 yds-177 td-1
last year-3td (on 30 receptions)

Keenan Burton - St. Louis - 2nd year out of Kentucky
rec-17 yds-171 td-0
last year-1td

Greg Camarillo - Miami - 4th year out of Stanford
rec-14 yds-119 td-0
last year-2td

Austin Collie - Indianapolis - Rookie out of Brigham Young
rec-20 yds-228 td-3
last year-at BYU (he's only got 1 start)

Julian Edelman - New England - Rookie out of Kent State
rec-21 yds-188 td-0
last year-at Kent State (he was a quarterback)

Bryant Johnson - Detroit - 7th year out of Penn State
rec-17 yds-207 td-1
last year-3td (never gone a season w/o a TD unlike our #80)

Josh Morgan - San Francisco - 2nd year out of Virginia Tech
rec-13 yds-202 td-1
last year-3td

Laurent Robinson - St. Louis - 3rd year out of Illinois State
rec-13 yds-167 td-1
last year-5 recs

Mike Sims-Walker - Jacksonville - 3rd year out of UCF
rec-28 yds-398 td-3
last year-1 start 16-recs

Jerheme Urban - Arizona - 6th year out of Trinity
rec-15 yds-172 td-0
last year-4tds (this guy plays behind Fitzgeral, Boldin & Breaston)

Mike Wallace - Pittsburgh - Rookie out of Mississippi
rec-18 yds-296 td-1
last year-at Mississippi

15Oct/090

Michael Clayton Is THE Reason The Bucs Are 0-5

One bad one will spoil the bunch

One bad one will spoil the bunch

As fans and coaches start looking for answers to the Bucs poor start to the season, and amid Jimmy Wilkerson's warning that another loss could cause serious rifts in the locker room, it would be reassuring if someone could definitively say, "This is the problem, " so the organization could go about fixing it.

Well, 80Sucks.com has come to the rescue.  Here is the problem:

Michael Clayton

Now, some people might say, "Come on, it's not ALL Clayton's fault".

Really?  Really?  Then how do you explain this:

In a May interview with Tony Lopez of BleacherReport.com, Michael Clayton describes himself as "a leader to young guys coming in, been their voice . . . kinda show them the ropes and hang out and teach them things".  He goes on to say, "So I've been that guy behind the scenes ever since I've gotten here."

What a scary freakin' thought.  Michael Clayton taking our young talent under his wing and showing them the way.  WTF!!!!  No wonder we suck.

Would you let Mike Tyson teach your kid to read?  Or teach them anger management techniques?  Then why would you let Mike Clayton teach your young players anything.  Someone should have been keeping Clayton away from all of our potential future stars.  In fact, we'd go so far as to say the Bucs should have gotten a restraining order against him

Do you need more proof?  He says in the interview, "I'm friends with everybody, I've counseled a lot of people in a lot of situations, Aqib, Tanard."  OK, we love Aqib and Tanard, they are absolute studs and along with Barrett Ruud the future of the Bucs defense, but let's put it this way, I wouldn't let them go on a date with my daughter.  Obviously Clayton counsels the same way he catches, because these two have more arrests than Clayton has catches (wait, is that an insult?).

But this is a Clayton Hatin' site, so back to the topic at hand. 

Do you want to know the scariest part, it's not just the young guys that Clayton may have spoiled.  In his own words Clayton says, "Nobody comes in this locker room without me talking to them, to be honest."

What's next, are the Bucs gonna let John Daly councel guys on abstinence or Louie Anderson talk to them about proper eating or Drew Carey teach them how to tell a joke?

Seriously, if you want to turn this ship around Buccaneers, someone needs to f'ing keep Clayton from imparting his "wisdom" on our other players.

So we identified the problem, now it's up to Raheem or someone within the organization to stand up and fix it.

The Gang @ 80Sucks.com

11Oct/091

Why Is Michael Clayton On The Bucs – Part 1

Don't worry Coach, we'll help you figure this out

Don't worry Coach, we'll help you figure this out

Raheem Morris issued his infamous challenge after the week 1 loss to Dallas in which he dared someone to write an article about why Michael Clayton is on the team.  Here is our response to that challenge (Part 1).

Why is Michael Clayton on this team?

We will actually go out and find the hard stats on this stuff in the upcoming week, but by our account, Michael Clayton was thrown to today 12 times. 

Of the 12 throws that came his way, he dropped 3 of them.  That's three drops in one game.  Even by Clayton's horrible standards that is impressive.  Coming into the game he was averaging 1 drop per game, so he outdid himself today.  We've heard reports that the Bucs had four drops on the day, so if that's accurate, Michael Clayton accounted for 75% of the teams drops.

Of the 12 throws that came his way, he caught 3 of them.  Josh Johnson completed passes to 8 different targets today and Clayton caught more than only Tight Ends John Gilmore and Jerramy Stevens and Offensive Lineman Donald Penn.  Actually, in the first half Clayton and Donald Penn had the same number of receptions but Penn had more yards, NO DROPS and he wasn't even technically thrown to.  (Note: their receiving stats for the New York and Washington games were identical)  But regardless of how much better Donald Penn's hands are, a #2 receiver needs to catch more than 33% of the passes coming his way.

Of the 12 throws that came his way, 5 were incompletions.  By far the highest number of any of the targets Josh Johnson was throwing to.  In fact, Clayton accounted for only 11.5% of Josh Johnsons completions but 20.8% of his incompletions.  Something doesn't add up there. 

Of the 12 throws that came his way, 1 was intercepted.  He was there, he could have laid out for it, but he didn't.  He just quit on the play.  And as a result, Josh Johnson's pass got intercepted, the drive ended, and Philadelphia took control of the ball.

So let's summarize why Michael Clayton should not be on this team. 

  1. Drops - after this week I'm sure Clayton will be the league leader in this category (and for those keeping score, that is not a category you want to be a leader in).  Maybe Clayton should stop complaining about his "opportunities" when they are bouncing off his hands at this alarming rate.  If the ball hits your hands you should catch it, no excuses.  And when the drops happen on critical 4th down situations you are costing your team the chance to continue drives and score points.
  2. Reception percentage - Josh Johnson completed over 50% of his passes but Clayton only caught 33% of the ones that came his way.  So who is the problem?  Obviously someone is catching these passes, so let's keep sending "opportunities" their way. 
  3. Quitting on plays - from the opening play when he tried to "one hand" a Josh Johnson bomb to the final interception that he stopped short on, Clayton repeatedly costs this team with his lack of effort.  Josh Johnson needs receivers that are going to bust their butts so his passes will be caught, his rythm will improve, his confidence will build, and his stats will look better.

Coach Morris, you wonder why people ask why Michael Clayton is on this team?  How about this.  If Clayton stayed at home today, Josh Johnson would have been 23-0f-38 (60.5% vs. 52%) for 215 yards with 2 Touchdowns and 2 Interceptions (1 less turnover). 

Without Clayton, your team would be better.  That's why we wonder why he's on the team.  We all want the Bucs to be better, but Clayton is holding you back.

The Gang @80Sucks.com

7Oct/091

Raheem, we accept your challenge!

<b>You think you're frustrated Mike?  How do you think Buc fans feel?</b>

You think you're frustrated Mike? How do you think Buc fans feel?

A few weeks ago (after week 1 of the NFL season to be exact) Bucs coach Raheem Morris issued the challenge, "I dare somebody to write an article about why Clayton is on the team again".

He was speaking about receiver Michael Clayton after Claytons week 1 performance against the Dallas Cowboys in which he caught 5 passes for 93 yards.  It was definitely a great individual day for Clayton, in fact, it was probably among the top 3 games of his career.  But like all of his fine individual performances, it resulted in a loss.

But what was truly shocking about the Coach Morris Challenge, was that media people actually respected it.  In fact, we have yet to see anyone call out Michael Clayton since then, with the exception of Dan Sileo of 620 WDAE who we have tremendous respect for.

So, Coach Morris, we would like to publicly accept your challenge, or dare, and we will write an article on "Why is Michael Clayton on this team?".

Then we'll follow it up with other fascinating topics like "How did Clayton get that contract?" and "How many games will Clayton go without a catch?" and "Is Clayton the biggest bust in Bucs history?".

So we welcome your challenge Coach, and we hope you read our articles and give them fair consideration when making any further roster decisions.

And Mike, we hope you're reading too!

The Gang @ 80Sucks.com